Machete (2010)

Machete (2010)
Directors: Robert Rodriguez, Ethan Maniquis
Writers: Robert Rodriguez, Álvaro Rodríguez
Cast: Danny Trejo, Steven Seagal, Robert De Niro, Jessica Alba, Lindsay Lohan & introducing Don Johnson
After being betrayed by the organization who hired him, an ex-Federale launches a brutal rampage of revenge against his former boss.
Fuck yeah thanks for Blades, Bewbs & Buckets'o'Blood as Rodriguez shameless mexploitation throwback to early 80's action b-movies rides into town on a drop handle Harley. Famously it started life as the most popular mock trailer between his and Tarantinos Grindhouse double bill. Plots about lone Mexican drifter Machete (Trejo) and his attempt to bring down Texas's corrupt leadership and the redneck vigilante border patrol they've set up.The cast fit so well Trejo was born to play the central lead Machete, aiding him are Alba as undercover agent Sartana and Michelle Rodriguez as Luz a underground Mexican freedom fighter. Then theres the brutes Steven Seagal, Don Johnson & legendary FX artist Tom Savini working with Jeff Fahey to get crooked politician De Niro into power. Also added in the mix are Cheech Marin as Machetes stoner Priest brother and Lindsay Lohan (a role echoing her personal life & managing to fit a nod towards exploitation gem MS.45) as a wayward coke fueled socialite turned killer nun.

Thankfully the risk of turning that Grindhouse trailer into a main feature after the luke warm reception & box office they received paid off, as this is far more authentic and a much more rewarding view than both Death Proof & Planet Terror. It starts with its foot firmly down on the accelerator and never takes it off, ticking everything 80's trash cinema ever threw our way while speeding by then delivering us new delights. I swear during the scene Machete intestine bungee jumps from an hospital ward, I had a smile on my face like I was 8 years old again opening gifts on Christmas day. Essential viewing for anyone like myself who grew up seeing Robert Gintys flamethrower/meat grinder killing spree in the classic The Exterminator.
(9 out of 10)

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